Thursday, September 27, 2012

NFL Thursday: The Unmushable matchup

If you tuned in either of the last two weeks you witnessed the birth of an anti-prophet.
In picking huge offensive outputs from both the Bears and the Panthers (among other ridiculous prognostications) I have set myself up in the comfortable position of being a so wrong my information is invaluable

Unfortunately tonight's game features the Ravens against the Browns in what is a game even a mush of my pedigree can't screw up. Let's cut to the stats of this year's Art Modell Bowl:

  • John Harbaugh is 8-0 against the Browns - advantage Ravens
  • Browns' Defense is giving up 269 yards per game through the air - advantage Ravens
  • Browns have lost 9 straight games dating to last season - advantage Ravens
  • Joe Flacco, Ray Rice, Torrey Smith > Brandon Weeden, Trent Richardson, Greg Little - advantage Ravens
  • Ravens are at home - advantage Ravens
  • Browns' corner Joe Haden suspended until mid Oct. - advantage Ravens

In fact the only discernible advantage the Browns have is that I am picking the Ravens to win big. I'm envisioning Flacco airing the ball out early and often to Smith, Anquan Boldin and Dennis Pitta. I see Ray Rice rushing for for 150 yards. I see touchdowns everywhere. I see Ray Lewis gnawing on one of Weeden's severed limbs. The whole thing is much closer to a scene from Braveheart than an NFL game.

So there you have it, in a game featuring an unstoppable force facing a very movable object I'm picking the unstoppable force. Now let's see what karma can do with that one. If the Browns even come close and the final score is 10-6 then I'm going to have to register my psychic powers with the Alliance of Magicians.


James said...

Hi – will you please post your Blog at The Fantasy Football Community ay Our members will love it.
They include: FF Enthusiasts, Team Owners, Leagues, Experts, etc.
It's simple just cut and paste the link and it automatically links back to your website… You can also add Articles, News, Photos, Videos and More! Free and easy…
Email me if you need any help or would like me to do it for you.
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